For some writers revision can be a tedious guinea pig’s wheel of picking their words apart. Personally, I find it is challenging but exciting to rework draft after draft until a polished version emerges from the chaos and I’m satisfied that it is the best I can make it. I think Adrienne Rich killed the mundanity of it for me when she broke the word “Re-vision – the act of looking back, of seeing with fresh eyes…”
In this post, I share my revision process. These guidelines are distilled from years of writing and have worked well for me. Hopefully, you find them useful too. For ease, I’ve organized this post into 3 sections: Scribe’s Tips, Scribe’s Revision Checklist and an Example (with pictures!). Here we go!
Scribe’s Tips
In order to revise successfully, a poet (or any writer) must…
• be ruthless in cutting what does not contribute to their draft.
• shift their mindset from imaginative to analytical.
• understand that it will get messy before it gets better.
• have a grasp of what makes a good poem.
• trust their instinct. If something seems off, it probably is.
• get distance from the revised draft before coming to it again.
• not be afraid to experiment.
Scribe’s Revision Checklist
I vet every single draft against this checklist.
List 3 strengths of the poem.
List 3 weaknesses.
Examine syntax, diction, word choice.
Metaphors and similes.
Voice: who is speaking in the poem?
Point of view: what is their opinion on the subject?
Is the beginning strong?
Is the ending strong?
Rhythm and sound.
Line breaks, enjambments, caesuras.
Imagery: abstract or concrete.
Symbolism: the idea(s) represented
Other poetic devices.
Check for cliches.
Emotional resonance.
Elements of revelation or surprise.
Title: what does it say about the poem?
Proofread.
Read aloud.
Example
“Luciferin” was published by Ellipsis in 2012. I was inspired by the word which I found is the enzyme that makes a firefly’s end glow. The pictures show how the poem moved from idea to published version. And because I’ve just finished watching a courtroom drama I’m calling them Exhibit A, B and C. Click on them to enlarge. I’ve only included relevant drafts.
Exhibit A, left page: Mind maps help me brainstorm around the idea. I make word associations, connections, put down information about the topic.
Exhibit A, right page: The first draft is a very rough sketch, fleshing out my basic idea, exploring different treatments for it. I’m mostly revising for content at this stage. And yes, I doodle.
Exhibit B, left page: By this stage, I’ve strengthened content and have progression for the poem. I give attention to images and words. A line structure is emerging.
Exhibit B, right page: I have decided to use the two-line structure for the poem but still need to strengthen line breaks. I circle words that need to be stronger and start taking out superfluous words to tighen the verses.
Exhibit C: By the final revision, my word choices are resolved; the line structure and breaks are strong; rhythm, sound and flow have been worked out; weaknesses have been weeded out, it has been proofread.
Well, that’s a wrap! Feel free to ask me any questions about this post. Until next week!
P.S.: This post took 23 revisions 🙂
Zakia R. Khwaja
So glad you read them all, Khayyam! For me, there is no greater joy than writing and I’m excited about sharing what I know and learning as I go on. Thank you for your feedback. It means alot!
Khayyam Mushir
Rubab I actually read all the blogs today and I’m glad I waited. This is well thought out cogent writing advice and I found some of your tips very useful particularly around mind mapping and diving headlong into thefirst draft rather than waiting for the right sentence or paragraph to arrive miraculously in our heads. Like all writers I’m guilty also of a huge and rather fragile ego at times sacrificing my writing on the altar of perfection. Oh well we live and learn. Anyhow will keep checking for more tips. Like your poetry scribes madness comes straight from the heart. Well laid out site too!
sajjad14
Another useful read. Please clarify enjambments? Caesuras? Also u wud b happy to know that your blog is helping me even with my office report and letter writing so its not just restricted to poetry 🙂
Zakia R. Khwaja
Enjambment is specific to poetry and is a run-on verse. It doesn’t end with the line but continues into the next one. From the above example, an enjambment is “A winged light-bringer burning/ the daystar in its end…”the sentence carries over into the next line.
Caesura is a pause in a line of verse such as the halt between “light-bringer” and “burning.”
Good to know the blog is helping you with your writing. That’s the idea! Thank you.